Rays of hope

After Boris’s announcement of his road map out of lockdown, hope has joined us at the table and is driving off the uncertainty. And today, as if to reinforce this, the sun is shining. Not quite as brightly as at the weekend, but it is making an appearance. This morning I heard the birds sing for the first time in a few weeks. Hope is here. We want to believe what Boris has said, we want these things to happen and we certainly have a good reason to think that they might indeed happen, especially since our vaccination roll out is going so very well and the R is going down at a steady pace.

Some of us are cheering about this plan, apparently 46% of people are happy with it and the rest of the people polled believe that the changes are too fast or too slow but the long and short of it is that we are coming out of lockdown and we are on the road back to normality, or at least the new normal. This can’t be anything but a good thing and we hope that it is sooner rather than later, of course. We feel hopeful but there are still lots of questions about the effectiveness of the vaccine against the new variant and we are all weary, tired even, of this state of limbo that we are in. We have been here before, the children in school, non essential shops open, and look where that got us…

Our emotions don’t always co-operate with reality, no matter whether things are easy or difficult in our lives, our feelings don’t necessarily follow suit. And they change every day, every hour, every moment and so this feeling of hopefulness can still be drowned out by the things that are coming at us either from within us or from outside, on a global, national, local or personal level and it’s difficult for us to keep the faith but we absolutely must. It’s so important in life to nurture a feeling of hope, no matter how difficult things get, because things never stop changing. Maintaining, nurturing that feeling of hope will be important over the coming months, especially is you are someone whose life can really open up again once everyone is back to work, those of us who have lost jobs spring to mind.

How to keep on hoping:

1. Be conscious.

When you feel that your feelings of hope and optimism about what is coming starts to wane, and your mind is filling with negative thoughts and your heart with negative feelings, fall back on your morning routine and if this is not enough, incorporate elements of it in your daily life. Sitting quietly, either to reflect or to meditate is a great way to let go of the negativity. If necessary, take a notepad and write down what you need to do next, or what you want your focus to be. Be conscious.

2. Appreciate, appreciate, appreciate

Appreciating what we have is of utmost importance all the time but can be especially helpful when we are teetering on the edge of losing our focus on the good things of life. No matter how difficult things are, there is always something to be thankful for and by focusing on it, we maintain our hope not only about the what we are appreciating but about everything in our lives.

3. Look away from negativity

I say this a lot to people. Don’t look at the news if you want to feel hopeful. Recently I read a headline which really disturbed my peace of mind. I limit myself when it comes to the news and it’s a great way of protecting ourselves and especially during times when our hope is a more like a fragile sapling than a mighty oak. Don’t look at the news, and that includes social media where you can easily fall into the pit of despair that is comparing yourself and your life with others.

4. Forward focus

Remember to look forward and not back – looking back is disempowering because you can’t do anything about the past. It’s gone. There is nothing you can do about what you did or what others did to you and so it’s best to simply leave it alone so that you can avoid promoting the heartache that can come with it. Look to the things that you want for the near future. Think of the things that you enjoy and make plans to do them, however small. At the moment, I have been looking forward to going for a walk with friends and I am happy to say that I am now looking forwarding to doing that with the added bonus of sitting on a bench with them and having a coffee. It makes me feel pretty good to think about it.

5. Talk to someone who is feeling good

It’s always great to talk to someone who is feeling more positive than we are. When we are down in the doldrums it is easy to call the person who will agree with how difficult and unhappy things can be. Instead of reaching for the phone and calling someone who will think the way you are currently thinking, call the person whose outlook on life is a sunny one, one which is based in an understanding of the difficulties of life but who can listen and uplift you. These people are great to have as friends because they enhance your life in a way that those who just listen and agree or start telling you how miserable they are feeling, cannot.

Focus is everything and there are a myriad of ways in which we can remain hopeful, reading inspirational books is another great way of focusing on the hopeful side of life.

Remember, you are not alone!

hillybarker@gmail.com